Dear Graham Norton: 'My marriage is loving but sexless – is that enough?'

Graham Norton
Dear Graham Norton: 'My marriage is loving but sexless – is that enough?' Credit: Andrew Crowley/Alamy Stock Photo

Dear Graham

My problem, to put it bluntly, is that I don’t find my wife physically attractive any more. We have both put on weight since we married 23 years ago, admittedly, which doesn’t help; but when we do make love, a few times a year, she seems absent and disengaged, even once asking me, “Can’t you just get on with it?”

I have always tried to be unselfish and attentive to her needs but nowadays she doesn’t seem to have any. We are still close and we have talked about this a little: she says she still loves me and is happy for me to make love to her whenever I want to – but I don’t really want to, especially if she really isn’t interested.

As a committed Catholic, I take our marriage vows...

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