Dear Graham Norton: 'Living with my mental illness is driving my wife away'

Graham Norton
'I worry that even if I continue to manage my mental health, it’s too late,' writes a reader Credit: Andrew Crowley,

Dear Graham

I have recently been diagnosed with Aspergers and borderline personality disorder, and I am now receiving treatment for this. But it’s come too late to heal the wounds I inflicted on my marriage. My wife has had to put up with nearly 10 years of erratic behaviour on my part.

When we met I was a gigging musician, and I found performance and creativity therapeutic; but for practical financial reasons (mortgage, kids) I now work in the tight-lipped world of policing.

I adore my wife and our two children (three and five), and I want our marriage to work. But I worry that even if I continue to manage my mental health, it’s too late: the ship won’t turn. My wife says she is “burnt out with...

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